YANTO

A Rock Opera written and performed by

SCHEISSFINGER

SETTING:

The Frowning School for Boys, a private boy’s school in New York City. The year is 1978 and the Cold War is still booming along.

 

CHARACTERS

(in order of appearance):

 

The Angst Filled Teenager: A jaded and disrespectful young man who will be our evening’s master of ceremonies.

 

Claire Smith: Aged and somewhat confused Dean of the Frowning School who wanders the halls looking for dawdlers and miscreants.

 

Martin YANTO: An aging Beatnik artist who teaches wood shop and directs the art program at the Frowning School.

 

Miss Marcus: A Young art teacher in need of a mentor with something more. . .

 

The Four Students: Four middle school boys with stars in their eyes.

 

Monsieur Kayoun: Director of the school’s cutting edge language program, whose questionable accent seems to have had no effect on his being hired to teach French.

 

Madam Kayoun: Assistant director of the language program who also sounds suspiciously not French.

 

The Home Room Teachers: Four young men with BAs in English, Teaching certificates, and a taste for all male roller discos.

 

Mr. Zumalis: Gym teacher, middleweight boxer, and master of the rope climb.

 

Mr. Sench: FBI investigator

 

Mr. Edwards: FBI investigator

 

Mr. Xanis: FBI investigator

 

 

ACT ONE:

Scene One: Choir Practice and Wood Shop

 

Open on a small number of boys assembled as a choir Stage Right. They are dimly backlit and as they sing, The Angst Filled Teenager steps from among them into a spot light.

 

Introduction by Boys Choir singing Frowning School Theme (3:52) as Angst Filled Teen (AFT) introduces the Opera. Theme continues as AFT steps back into the choir and is replaced in the spot by Dean Claire Smith who formally welcomes visitors to the school.  He crosses the stage as the lights come up on Stage Left to reveal the Wood shop.  Here, Dean Smith introduces Martin Yanto, director of the Art Department, to whom Smith hands the audience as he exits Stage Right. The choir fades away into darkness.

 

Yanto introduces himself by singing YANTO Present (1:57).  He describes his 17 years at Frowning, the trials and tribulations of the job, and hints at his suspicions that there is something fishy in the Frowning School.  The young Miss Marcus who enters from Stage Right interrupts YANTO from these musings.  She launches into the sultry Hey Martin (2:12), in which she flirts with her much older colleague.  YANTO works vigorously to repel these onslaughts and is in the end successful.

 

The school bell rings and four students enter from Stage Right as Miss Marcus exits Stage Left. The Four Students (TFS) are talking incessantly about their Rock Idols Lick of Lust,and conspire to start a band of their own. They sing the rousing Hey Mr. YANTO (1:53), which describes their dream of stardom, how they will divvy up the musical responsibilities, and endeavor to seek YANTO’s assistance in building the necessary equipment and props. YANTO is in the midst of promising to think about their proposal when they are interrupted by Dean Smith who suspects the young boys should be elsewhere (French Class) and ushers them off Stage Right.

 

Left alone to his own musings, YANTO begins singing YANTO’s Lament (1:50) expressing his disgust with the world around him, his loss of focus, and his desire to do good.  By song’s end he wonders if the boys and their rock band might actually help to shake things up around the Frowning School, and help YANTO uncover the plot he senses will lead to the school’s (as well as the nation’s) end.

 

End of Scene One

 

Scene Two: The Language Lab

 

Lights fade up on Stage Right where we see the backs of a group of students sitting at desks facing their instructor.  They wear headphones and study their notebooks attentativly.  At the head of the Class we see Monsieur Kayoun standing before a Black board with Madame Kayoun sitting at a desk and occasionally speaking into a large desk mounted microphone.  The couple launches into The Language Lab (2:01) describing their desire to impart communist ideals to these supposed sons of industry.  Near the end of the number, The Four Students stumble into the room from Stage Left and are roundly kicked out for their interruption. 

 

End of Scene Two

 

Scene Three: The Hallway

 

As TFS wander from the Language Lab, Stage Right Fades and Center Stage is lit with a single wall of lockers occupying the rear wall. Here, the Students are accosted by The Home Room Teachers (HRTs) for not being where they ought to really be – gym class.  The students are barely dispatched to Stage Left before the HRTs break into Doing the Job (2:34).  This raucous number is cut short by the appearance from Stage Left of Dean Smith who ushers the HRTs off Stage Left as the lights fade

 

End of Act One

 

ACT TWO:

Scene One: Choir Practice / The Faculty Lounge

 

The backlit choir returns Stage Right and once again the AFT steps into the spot light to accost the audience for their extravagant ignorance at coming to the performance in the first place in Frowning School Theme Revisited (2:02).

 

Lights Fade on choir as they fade up Stage Left on the Faculty Lounge.  Enter YANTO who paces around the room a bit and sings YANTO’s History (2:08) which tells the audience about his WWII adventures, and voices further suspicions about the Kayouns.  He clearly becomes uncomfortable as the song progresses and finally he walks through a rear door in the set to what is obviously the Lounge’s bathroom.

 

Enter the Kayouns from Stage Right. . .

 

The Kayouns enter singing All Going So Well (3:38) while Yanto pears out through the crack of the crapper door

 

Unaware that they have given themselves away, the two head back to their lab and Yanto emerges from the Crapper with the energetic (less folky) YANTO’s Aha! that basically states his suspicions are confirmed.  He decides to report the Kayouns to some old war buddies now with the FBI, but as he heads out to contact them Miss Marcus tackles Yanto with the bump and grind Miss Marcus’ Return(3:35).  This song boils down to: Not so Fast Buddy, Where’s my Wood? Dean Smith pops in and runs an aged sort of interference for both parties, before YANTO can extricate himself from the situation.

 

End of Act 2

 

ACT 3: Gymnasium

 

The last scene of the play opens up in the school’s gymnasium where The Angst Filled Teenager gives us an update on the play and the boys choir sing a new version of the school hymn appropriate to the moment with the aptly named Frowning Overture for Act 3.

 

Lights fade up on the gym as mas macho teacher Zumalis who belches out the Cold War Anthem Dodge ball as kids are pummeled and bruised by a rowdy game of the sport.  While he sings, YANTO comes to seek the gym teacher’s aid in taking down the faux French teachers and their dastardly ploy.

 

The FBI Show up and sing a rousing G-men for YANTO in which they basically outline their not so subtle hero worship of the man who not only fought in the French resistance but went on to teach an entire generation how to make flammable wooden ashtrays without ever getting into a lawsuit AND maintaining full health insurance.  Within this piece the Federal agents reveal a subtle feminine side is revealed.  The bottom line, however, is that the FBI needs more proof before they can lock up the Kayouns.

 

The Four Students interrupt this by barging in and asking if they can do a rock show in the gymnasium.  They’ve recorded a demonstration tape in the language lab when the Kayouns were out to lunch.  As the entire ensemble gathers (sans les kayouns), The Pieces Fall Into Place is sung, the FBI agents take the tape and analyze the recording. Meanwhile The Home Room Teachers catch site of the G-men and express their infatuation.

Whatever is left on the tape after the four students have recorded a song onto it indicts the Kayouns enough that Zumalis is dispatched to round the spies up.

 

The rousing all ensemble piece which for now is called Super Vamp, has the Kayouns foisted away by the FBI, the kids putting on their rock show, Miss Marcus being swept off by the suddenly focused Dean Smith, and YANTO recognized as a brilliant American hero.

 

 

End of Act 3

Curtain

©2005 by Scheissfinger & Sweetfish Music